An update from Dixon: Hell, War, Wind and Water

The bed was a lot like the bed the princess slept on--except it didn't have a pea somewhere deep inside of it. It was up against a wall of glass. The lights that make up the South Loop of Chicago light up the entire room. It was like sleeping in the city...It was sleeping in the city.

Then I woke up and realized we had 115 miles to ride. But that seemed sort of average, so I stayed in bed for another half-hour.

We got a bit of a late start, but it wasn't any later than 10 a.m. when we finally took off. All the radio stations were mentioning that it was over 90 degrees--Fahrenheit, that is. One even informed me that it was as hot as hell outside. I was kind of surprised. I mean I haven't been to hell before, but it seemed kind of mild compared to what I had heard. Maybe I was mostly surprised that she had been to hell before and I hadn't heard of her. I'm actually thinking about doing a ride across hell next summer to raise money for Ben Hinn's ministries. Turns out the average temperature down there is about 97 degrees, but sometimes it does get down to the eighties though.

Getting out of the city was slow (with all the lights), hot (with the sun and the humidity), and an experience in what appeared to be lower-and working-class religion (we passed a large number of Baptist temples and churches). Our heads were hurting from the heat and dehydration when we finally pedaled 40 miles to a Sam's Club to eat lunch (go to as many of the sample stands as many times as possible). While there we learned about a guy who was denied Vietnam war benefits because the US government wouldn't acknowledge that he was there. He was in the Special Ops and did all of his missions (23 to be exact) in Laos and Cambodia. The government won't acknowledge that they were in Laos or Cambodia during Vietnam. He doesn't get any benefits. He thinks very highly of the government.

We left with 24 more oatmeal bars. I tweeted it yesterday, but I'll mention it again: Sam's Club is easily one of the best things that small children around the world spend countless, thankless hours in dirty shops sweating to make possible for the fine overweight, oversaturated, over-stimulated human beings of America.

About 5 miles down the road we stopped at a stop sign to admire the beautiful storm clouds that were going to hit us.

A car pulled up: "Hey guys they're calling for 50 mile-an-hour winds." He pulled away. Why thank you sir.

Another car pulled up: "Hey guys they're calling for 60 mile-an-hour winds." She pulled away. Thank you ma'am.

And another: "Hey, they're calling for 75 mile-an-hour winds. You guys might want to find some cover or something." And promptly pulls away...Thanks.

At that point it was getting hard to ride. We all got blown off the road. Then the hail started.

Rain and wind (it was legitimately at least 50 mph) are bad, but hail really stings the sunburn. Morgan noticed his back tire felt kind of funny...It was flat.

We started walking through the hail. A red car pulled up beside us and asked if we wanted to go in their garage to wait out the storm. As we couldn't ride, and weren't exactly enjoying ourselves, we accepted. We spent the next 45 minutes in the garage changing the tire, eating oatmeal snacks, and getting geared up to ride another 65 miles in the rain. It was about 4:30 p.m. when we left.

Things weren't bad until about 20 miles later--Morgan got another flat tire. We had cleaned out the inside of the tire the first time. It didn't really make sense. We still aren't sure what happened. Another 30 minutes were spent changing the tire. Morgan wasn't real pleased at this point.

Five miles later we hit a patch of road where the IDOT people (not idiot, though we questioned that ourselves) had decided to grate a seven-mile stretch of road. Hemorrhoids, anyone? 'nough said.

About 4 miles into that stretch we saw what at first glance looked to be two tornadoes coming at us from across the field of corn. After staring for a few minutes we figured out if was actually two smoke stacks. Then we thought we saw a funnel starting to form. Luckily it dissolved before too long. But as we continued to ride along the grated road we watched the storm come right up on us and almost blow us off our bikes. Another storm with at least 50 mph winds. Footage of that should be up shortly.

The wind blew us about a couple miles down the road. We stopped at the first Casey's gas station we found. Someone suggested trying to stay at the Fire Department. They all seemed to suggest we not continue to ride. We obliged them and spent the next half hour looking at the selection of rental movies they had.

A half hour later we started the 20 mile trek to our next Host house. Riding at night was gorgeous. One million fire-flies lit up each field as we passed. Cars were few and far between. The rain was light. The temperature was mild. Life was good--except we were wet, kind of cold, and very hungry. We finally made it at 11 p.m. where we were greeted warmly, bathed, fed, and set up with comfort. Very Nice.

If I could sum up the ride for everyone, I would say this: It was probably a low point for Morgan, though he handles those quite well; It helped Andy realize some things about himself as a person--both good and bad; Matt enjoyed it all except for the first few hours when his head hurt because of the heat.